to sit, to think, and to realise. that life is but a living memory.

i feel jaded. suddenly, life seems to have no meaning. to scramble up and down the wharf everyday, handling things that are so past my intellect and precious time. to tell myself, its alright to go home late, feel upset that im made to stay back later than i want to, then realise that i do not really have much to look forward to. and even now, realising that im incoherent in expressing what i think and feel.

so devoid of emotion.

yet, i cant feel anymore. i whine, sulk, but am unsure of what im upset over. oh God, i teared. i heard about how u loved me, how u covered me in your arms. but after the song is over, after im left in silence and solitude, when the dark of the night ungulfs me, i find myself so alone once again.

shoes, i miss u! kai, i wish u were here. but wishing all these, i know that all your presence does is to comfort, reassure. and after all this is over, i kick myself back into the cold harsh reality again. oh, bring me back to life.